Barnaby muses on Fifty Shades of Grey

Barnaby is in awe of EL James who has become the first author to break the one million downloads on the Kindle ereader with her erotic novel Fifty Shades of Grey, the first book in her trilogy that traces the deepening relationship between a college graduate, Anastasia Steele, and a young business magnate, Christian Grey.
Sadly, for those readers seeking more explicitly erotic scenes involving bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism, Barnaby can only offer cats which walk through walls, multidimensional universes, men in duck costumes or quirky verses which may or may not feature a rhinoceros.
His latest Tom Fletcher novel 'Every which way but East' has become his fastest downloading novel to date, probably because it can still be downloaded FREE by visiting www.barnaby-wilde.co.uk .
Barnaby can't promise that you'll find it sexually stimulating, but it might make you laugh.

Every which way but East

The latest Tom Fletcher novel, Every which way but East is now published.

Retired, bored, bald Tom Fletcher uncovers another dastardly plot to change the laws of probability. Pausing only to take part in a Speed Dating evening, he is soon creating havoc across multiple universes dressed as a duck.

Can Tom beat the Smiths? Will he find love? Can he play darts? What's a duck got to do with anything?

This book should only be read by people with a sense of the absurd.               
For a short time this book is available as a FREE ebook download.  Visit www.barnaby-wilde.co.uk for more information.

SALE TIME

July is Sale Time at Smashwords.  For one whole month Barnaby is offering 50% off the normal price for his two Tom Fletcher novels, "I Keep Thinking it's Tuesday" and "A Question of Alignment". 

To read samples or to purchase either book, click on the appropriate title above. The Sale begins on July 1st.

For more information about Barnaby Wilde and all his published books, visit www.barnaby-wilde.co.uk

Untitled

Low pressure systems continue to drift in across the country from the Atlantic with depressing regularity, bringing rain, wind and cloud with only occasional glimpses of the sun.  We are now past the longest day yet it feels as though summer this year has scarcely begun.

Every cloud, though, has a silver lining and Barnaby has been busy indoors typing when the weather was just too unpleasant to want to be outside. Even as the weeds have been growing apace in the garden, the third Tom Fletcher novel has been growing indoors.  As yet, the novel does not have a title, but it is anticipated that it will be completed and published as an ebook on Smashwords within the next couple of weeks.

As before, Tom Fletcher will be crashing through parallel universes and causing chaos, whilst Buff Gently and crew try to impose order and calm.  Expect clowns, elephants, ducks and darts to feature alongside skulduggery and speed dating.

For those who simply can't wait, or who have yet to catch up with Tom Fletcher's previous adventures, visit www.barnaby-wilde.co.uk to read samples or download copies of all Barnaby Wilde's novels and humorous poems.  Meanwhile, Barnaby will try to come up with a title for the new book.  Happy reading.

Barnaby gets a star

This week Barnaby got a star. Sadly just a single one.  A reviewer on the Barnes and Noble website left a one star review for Barnaby's adventure 'A Question of Alignment'. 

The review read:-   "TERRIBLE¿¿¿¿  One of the worst things ever!!!!!!"

Always a man trying to see his glass half full, Barnaby draws comfort from the four 'signo de pregunta' (the upside down question marks) and the six exclamation marks as well as the juxtaposition of the Upper and Lower case characters.  He is a little disappointed, though, that the reviewer posted his remarks anonymously.

It would seem that this reader didn't enjoy the book.  Fortunately, many other readers have enjoyed the Tom Fletcher stories.  You can judge for yourself by visiting www.barnaby-wilde.co.uk and reading a sample from 'I Keep Thinking It's Tuesday' or 'A Question of Alignment' as well as checking out Barnaby's books of humorous verse.

If you like what you read, then Barnaby would be delighted if you left a review.  The more stars the better!

Barnaby makes progress

Barnaby has been making good progress this week on recording the next adventure of Tom Fletcher.  As normal, Tom has been stumbling through life creating confusion whereever he goes.

After several years of inactivity, Tom, now a retired man, has taken up time travelling again, crashing through those East/West walls into parallel timelines, leaving his usual litter of objects that just shouldn't be there and risking upset to the fragile laws of probability.

This time, though, he may just have gone a wall too far.

Sadly, you will have to wait a few more weeks to find out just what chaos Tom has caused this time, but, of course, you can find out about his previous adventures as well as Barnaby Wilde's humorous verse, including some FREE downloads, by visiting www.barnaby-wilde.co.uk

Have a nice day.

Barnaby waves the flag

This weekend is Queen Elizabeth II Diamond Jubilee and the country is awash with jubilee celebrations, street parties and bunting.  Mrs W has done her bit by hanging union flag bunting around the front of the Wilde home and erecting a large union flag by the front entrance.  Later today the Queen will lead a one thousand boat flotilla down the river Thames before hosting a large concert outside Buckingham Palace this evening.  (Barnaby's ticket was apparently lost in the mail).

Unfortunately the weather has not been kind and most of today's celebrations in London will have to be enjoyed in good old British rain.

Fortunately Barnaby's ebooks can be enjoyed in rain or shine and can be found in any weather at www.barnaby-wilde.co.uk for preview or download in the format of your choice.

Today, Barnaby will be too busy waving the flag to write more, but normal service will be resumed tomorrow.  Have a nice day.